Saturday, November 28, 2009 @11:38 AM
christmas comes early this year
woohoo!
it would have been a really good surprise, but i'm still so glad and happy to be getting a new camera! all the squeezing n walking around in sitex was definitely worth it~
i really need to tidy my room.. any ideas where i can donate my old stuffs?
Friday, November 13, 2009 @12:08 AM
friday the 13th!
this is a momentous moment!
b'coz i'm... going to........................
PHUKET!!!hurray~!!! finally, my long awaited holiday!!
well, even tho its like, more than 4 months away..... lolz. and i've bought my christmas cum anniversary gift for jason. haiz, some way or another he'll always know what he'll get before he sees it. haha! or maybe i'm just plain lousy... oh wells.. to let him see or not to let him see.. that is really one big question.
christmas is still like, more than a month away.. -_-" i think i'm really quite out of my mind.
Monday, November 09, 2009 @9:20 PM
monday blues
actually its some 'afterflow' effect from sunday. i have this strange need to be and feel alone because i couldn't be comforted.
perhaps it all started from the movie 'the last house on the left'. it wasn't horror although there was blood and gore. i had wanted to watch the movie because i was intrigued by the storyline - how 2 girls got hurt by a gang of sadist, and how her parents made their 'revenge'. actually, from reading the sypnosis, its not difficult to predict how the story will enfold. what i really wanted to see was the reactions and actons of the girl's parents.
and i would say i liked the movie. touched even. because when the girl's parents cried, i could feel their pain as a parent who felt the pain of seeing their child hurt.
something i feel that my very own parents lack. which saddens me so much, i can't even describe the disappoitment. a child never questions the unconditional love of a parent. and i don't, because it is just pointless to do so.
then i watched 'blood - the last vampire' and i can't help but question my own existance. after all the rejection, disappointment, depression and anger... i feel so empty. thats the thing about japanese anime and movies that are dark/intriguing. the ending is always obscure and abrupt. there is all these mixed emotions and action and final confrontation and then... nothing.
maybe the japanese should look more into inputing more moralities into their show. perhaps that's why the suicide rate in japan is so high. so many people out there are lost and don't feel that they have a meaning in life. and death, is such a relief.
i really should try to stop having such morbid thoughts. it gets me doubting my ability to sustain a relationship and i wonder if i'll drive jason crazy someday. everytime i see his friends i realise how i have many friends, but i'm not as close to any... perhaps i only have myself to blame.
sigh, come what may.
Wednesday, November 04, 2009 @12:13 AM
chilli crab cup noodles!
mom has been really nice to me lately. like, really really nice. and i can't figure out what's up her sleeves. there is always a motive.
always.
i just don't know what it is yet...
have the urge to get a new look. i dunno y.. but i just wanna do something! its actually alil premature.. had intended to get a new look slightly before christmas (then can last till new yr too? haha..) so broke...
payday come quick!!!