happy boxing day!
even though i opened all my presents already... =p
very grateful & thankful.
tomorrow is my driving test!
so nervous.. i hope n pray that it doesn't rain.. or if it really must rain, i pray that god bless me with a nice tester that'll let me pass.
amen!
am just feeling alittle down..
saded that i was forgotten.. i thought i would be but i would like to think i was wrong u know? guess i was right...
and then, i don't know why but somehow the more i think about it, the more i feel that alex and christina are more suitable for each other... how they're both so emo in the same way, caring for their loved ones in the same way, having the same interests... i wonder if one day alex will finally realise and leave me for her?
there's a tinge of hurt and pain at the thought but i guess i'll learn to give em my blessings. maybe in the beginning i forsee myself avoiding them for awhile.. like how darkness avoids the light? but i suppose i'll come to terms with it in time. don't i always? i'm pretty sure i'm capable of it. yeah..
haha..
can't wait to go home.. and indulge in gaming, where i'll forget all earthly matters. the more u think about them the more hurt u'll get. family doesn't matter. friends doesn't matter. love doesn't matter.
life doesn't matter.
thats y i love gaming. i'm all alone to myself sometimes, and it just doesn't matter. or whatever... haha, so rhymie..
still need to pick up a few more christmas pressies for my parents (even though i already gave my mom $800), my sis & brother-in-law, something for francis, yc and stephen, and lots of wrapping... oh ya, atill got christmas cards..
sigh.
◎Your life is represented by the cloud of wealth, and enjoy your life very much, which means you are lucky in making money and tend to spend easily. You are somewhat of a perfectionist, and like kind and committed people. You are talented, outstanding, and enjoy literature, art, and other broad interests. However, execution ability is something you need to focus on. ◎
Your characteristics, subconscious, and behavior modes, according to your fate and destiny, are represented by the cloud. You are born seeking perfection and have an interest in literature and many other things. You are talented and learn well; you have a quick reaction, sharp observation, and good analysis and communication skills. You like to find out the facts and reasons behind everything, and have unique analysis and judgement, but lack execution and action abilities. The cloud floats around from one place to another along with the wind, so your way of thinking is very active and creative because there are many things you want to do. The shape and appearance of the cloud is ever changeable, therefore you can adapt to a new environment with a different status and role. Regardless of how bad the situation can be, you gradually adapt and then eventually change the environment. You adjust quickly, but give the impression that you are not sincere with your words because you always say different things to please different people. The cloud flows continuously, hardly slows down, so you have a strong ability to think and plan, but less ability to take action. You have many expectations in life and the ability to improve, but hardly take the necessary actions. You like gentle and kind persons, dislike hypocrites, and admire those who are mature, responsible, trustworthy and keep their words. In your entire life, regardless of the flow or direction, you are always able to keep an innocent, true heart to overcome all kinds of difficulties.
◎Health Analysis: Your cardiovascular function is weaker.◎
According to your destiny analysis, your cardiovascular function is weaker, which caused minor problems like pimples, mouth and tongue sores, and unsmooth periods when you were young. But over age 40, your cardiovascular function requires additional care, or you might have major problems such as high blood pressure, high hem sterone, unusual heart rhythm, eye pressure problems, gynecologic problem and other abnormal functions leading to heart diseases, stroke, or loss of vision. Therefore, it's very important for you to maintain a stable schedule in your life, avoid fatigue, and, most importantly, do not to stay up overnight. If possible, have a blood test and electrocardiogram periodically and pay more attention if there's any family history of hereditary palatine canal system and cardio diseases such as heart disease, high blood pressure, apoplexy, cerebral hemorrhage, myocardial infarction, etc. Try to eliminate iced and cold drinks in order to avoid losing your vitality.
There's a saying that all disease starts from the mouth, which means many human diseases are related to food. According to Traditional Chinese Medicine, food can be divided into gold, wood, water, fire and earth (concept of the five elements). You seem to prefer bitter flavors like black coffee and chocolate, which means your cells are filled with too much fire element. This negatively affects your health, fortune and career, so we suggest you try different foods to balance your diet and nutrition, which leads to harmony in life and a balance of yin and yang based on the five elements. In addition, if you have recently felt unlucky or things were not going smoothly, then you are probably affected by bad spirit, which caused bad luck. The best solution is not to eat meat and fish for a period of time until the bad spirit goes away. The bad spirit tends to stay with those who eat meat and fish, and also chicken, duck, green onion, garlic, leek and other spices, so a vegetarian diet can help change your luck.
◎Health Analysis: The function of your respiratory system is weaker as well.◎
The function of your respiratory system is weaker as well, and you have had minor problems like allergies, runny nose, cough, cold, chest pain, diarrhea and constipation when you were young. But over age 40, additional care of your respiratory system is needed, or it may lead to nasosinutisis, asthma, bronchopneumonia, bronchitis, intestines polyp and proctitis. Therefore, you should avoid fatigue and smoking, maintain a stable, regular lifestyle and schedule, and sleep and wake early in order to protect a congenitally weaker respiratory system.
According to your destiny analysis, your working and living environment tends to be a bit messy and without good air circulation, which is not good for your respiratory system. You tend to be anxious, lack patience and tolerance, which means you don't get along well with friends.
If you want to change your fate and destiny, breath deeply for five minutes per day, maintain good air circulation, and open a window or door in your room. As long as you have sufficient oxygen in your body, your destiny will be completely changed with better health, more wealth and happiness coming into your life.
◎In your relationship, you are mutually loving and respectful of each other. Your love is full of romance and happiness. Your future partner will also help you with financial management, and contribute fortune and wealth as he has the luck to help his wife. ◎
In romance, according to our analysis, men usually like you at first sight. If they win your heart, a romance develops quickly, but doesn't last long because it's difficult to maintain the same level of passion from beginning to end. Generally speaking, you make a good first impression because you are charming and capable, but over time your passion is replaced by arguments. You are often admired, but are not satisfied with what you have, and your romantic partner may be very sticky if you want to break up. Therefore, if you are still waiting for a good romance, try to conceal your outer beauty in order to find more sincere and suitable lovers who aren't just attracted to your looks. Then true romance will come your way.
In the journey of life, your romantic or marriage partner may appear easily, and most possibly someone in your life and social circle. It could be someone introduced through school, work, or community association. You may marry early, so if you are still seeking your love partner look among the people around you; the person who is most handsome and attractive might possibly be the one. As long as you sincerely give a little hint, the happiness is right beside you.
◎Career Analysis: Most of your jobs, in any industry, require some professional training or expertise.◎
Most of your jobs, in any industry, require some professional training or expertise. For example, finance banker, accountant, engineer, lawyer, government official, consultant, etc. As long as you gain more professional experience and new industry knowledge, your value in a company will be irreplaceable. If you choose jobs that require professional training, your work will go smoothly (jobs that are labor intensive are not suitable). You tend, however, to think from only your own point of view, so you may lack the broad perspective for higher management. You should further strengthen your experience, and if you want to reach the next professional level, then you should be more understanding and considerate of other employees and communicate more, in order to improve your leadership ability.
◎Wealth Analysis: You know how to make money and save money, so you are seldom short of cash.◎
According to the destiny analysis, you know how to make money, and also know how to save money, so it's not easy for you to be short of cash. You knew the importance of the money since you were very young, so you started with your investments earlier than others. Therefore, you were generating and accumulating more money and wealth through investment while others were spending money and enjoying their lives. In addition, you were born very clever, and will not spend money if not necessary, but you are very interested in investing business, and very keen to be your own boss with your own career. You will be saving majority portion of your wealth, to invest in the real-estate or to establish your own business. Afterwards, you will bequest most of your wealth to your busband and relatives.
its pretty accurate..
take urs at: http://www.superfate.com/channel_fortune
really really sleepy wei.. the weather is so not helping. i feel like taking a day off to snuggle in bed all day lor... then maybe spend the rest of the day chionging flyff..
goodness its only tuesday. the weekends flew by too quickly lar.. my parents will also be back when i get home later too.. sigh, hope they had a gd trip and not nag at me laters.
i wanna buy some shoes..
a new handphone.. (still deciding between N73 and Sony 850i)
a comfy pillow.. (to hug n sleep in office)
a couple of dresses? handbag?
ever since joining csu i'm like wearing jeans after jeans after jeans.. i wanna transform into dressy jo~ go feminine... but.. i no sense of style leh..
if only i could sleep everything all away..
sian, friday after the 'christmas party' i still need to stay on for an event at cool deck. then now also dunno what to buy for the 2nd christmas gift exchange. yew leong gave a pretty good suggestion, but i'm wondering what'll happen if i really gave him that... hmmm...
haiz, cannot think liao.. zzZZ x_x
i summon the power of cuddles!! haa..
there's suppose to be a christmas bazaar. and we've got a stall, to sell of some of the things we bought on that are still new and sell at a cheaper rate or something. and i packed some stuff. early in the morning.
and i forgot to bring.
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
T-T want to cry already. i also forgot to bring my phone. what in the world was i thinking early in the morning!?!
neways, TGIF.
mom n dad are in vietnam!!! Freedom & peace ~ ~ ~
oh ya, n yesterday alex dyed his hair. =/
was so utterly speechless when i saw it. i didn't think it was nice.. cos i like guys with black hair (this is pure personal preference). i feel thay hair dye is more of a girls thing? i know there r some guys who can pull it off with a different colour or maybe some highlights. but i thought it didn't really suit alex.. didn't want to break his heart. but i also dunno how to face him later.. -_-
he's making me have the urge to do something to my hair too.. must resist!!!
sigh, so bored in office now..
my posts might have been rather boring lately cos there's nothing really exciting happening around me. especially so since i just came back to work after a five day break last week.
or thats what i thought yesterday.
early in the morning mom bad-mouthed. guess she didn't know i was in the toilet washing up and overhearing every single word. being super tired and angry, i stepped out of the house 1st and headed straight to the car to nap. usually i would be a nice girl and wait till she stepped out of the house, and then close and lock the door for her.
since she was so mean and was saying how once i start playing i can't stop (when i didn't play at all the night before) and how long i took (funny? i wonder how i was FIRST to be out of the house) and etc, i figured she could bloody well use her excessive energy to close and lock the door herself since she was last to come out.
having had to 'endure' her complaints, my dad also wasn't gentlemenly and didn't wait for her either. his excuse being he needed to start up and warm the engine when my mom threw another tantrum at the car. b!tch
u will only understand my anger if u went thru what i did this morning. or my whole life for that matter.
sigh.
well on a lighter note i'm really happy for the singapore sailing team who won 5 gold medals in doha.. i was most excited when i caught the live action on tv yesterday night and saw Justin in the boat representing Singapore. omg. that short vulgarity spurting furball made it! how long has it been since i last saw him sia.. ok maybe i should say short la.. he was shorter than me during sec 1 n 2 days, but after that he shot up pretty quickly. energetic and funny fella who stayed just a couple blocks away from me. but aside from training together and going home together.. we weren't really close. still, i'm really happy for him. his new captain kinda reminds me of darren and i wonder if clarence was watching.
it really brings back memories of all the trainings.. esp when the commentor was talking abt how their trainings paid off, i was like, you bet they trained hard! the hours spent at sea when i was in sec sch must surely be nothing compared to being in the national team.
i still remember how i gave up sailing after the loss of being in 1st for girls in the national sailing competition. i was leading in our team but yan ru won it b'cos she tacked away and completed the last race. had i tacked sooner... see how the past still shadows over me.. -_-
never look back. i'm glad i left. mom nagged lesser bout me being tanned and abt how dangerous the sport is. i felt less sad remembering the incident and how lonely it is cos my parents didn't support me when most of my friends had either their dad or mums or siblings coming down to support them in every competition. perhaps god didn't want me to win for a reason.
in short i'm just happy for justin. proud of him even though i only knew him for a briefest of time. he's done st hilda's proud. he's done singapore proud. he's done himself very very proud. =) well, kudos to his whole team as well.
once again, i'm counting down to the time i knock off. there's work to be done, but nothing really urgent. i wish i could just get some more rest at home. mom n dad's going vietnam tmr. yayness. just wish i don't have to entertain ppl and just stay home for some time for myself.
christmas is coming!
am starting to feel abit of the festive season.. which means the calling for shopping of christmas presents.. headache.. seriously dunno wad to buy for everyone.
life seems to be back to normal. alex is being sweet again. i've resigned to fate again. and thats about it. i'm willing myself to appreciate and love. he is like destined to be my husband already. i've seriously just never met someone who's so hard on not giving up the relationship. i guess its not exactly a bad thing.. but neway.. i don't have the energy to break it.. so its just baby steps. walk one step, see one step.
we had a very nice meal at carls jr. and while window shopping, bought each other a nike bag at vivo city just yesterday, where we chose together and he paid for mine while i paid for his bag. i believe we were both pretty satisfied, and the fact that his bag cost abt 60 over bucks (despite 10% discount) have yet to sink into me. i'm ultra broke now, and i have no idea where some of my money went. or should i say i forgot where it went? so anyways, i'm looking forward to the 18th.. just 6 more days!!
oh yea, and i finally caught happy feet! i love the show.. alex wanna catch night at the museum and i'm interested in the death note marathon since i didn't catch the 1st movie. i wonder if i can download it into my vision m..
i feel very thankful that i've met an honest dealer for my vision m.. now i'm just waiting for a letter.. then now i've got loads of entertainment in it, thanks to yi ling, and some comics for company while travelling, then flyff when i get home.
life is busy @.@
thanks to a bowl of porridge, i got a free ride to work and am early.
and guess what, i missed happy feet again!!!!! again = 2nd time. i want to be so angry but haiz, i'm not gonna bother. give up already. better luck next week perhaps..
and again i've agreed to give alex what he wanted. i'm just too tired to fight. die already. if i don't fly to aussie, thats it...
sigh. just looking forward to jogging and getting my vision m later this evening. countdown of 9 hours till end of the day. ugh..
helpful tips/links from jem for my coming vision m:
(mp4 converter)
(to keep videos) http://keepvid.com
i'm so tired of explaining to someone with selective hearing. and there's no point in saying further, because nothing will be heard. why can't he just let me go?
must i really need to go to the extreme of avoiding and ignoring you? when will you understand that you can't make me love you and you can't keep me by your side saying "its ok that you don't love me, as long as you stay with me".
it pains me as much as i know it pains you.
but to stay on means turning very cold towards you. and its not something i want, or deliberately do! when will you understand??
i feel so fustrated and would so like to vent it out but the moment i see you i turn speechless because i know i would be wasting my breath.
argh!!!!!
am i wrong? my heart softens but my head says no. you want more time, but i'm impatient. you say you will change but it pains me to have you changed. why are you doing all this for me. why is it that i crave for so much love, but when someone loves me so much i push him away?
i didn't realise how much i have hardened myself. what is love? i love my friends. or at least, those that love me. but ever since samuel. ever since i cried my heart out. i've never quite been the same. what can i do to change? what should i do??
sigh. the wonders of how histroy repeats itself. if its not the fault of others, it's definately me. dunno la, see how it goes. meeting alex again later. i feel like i know whats gonna happen next. i'm totally filled with dread and tears.
detach!
shall not think about it. on a lighter note, i'm gonna buy the creative vision m tomorrow! god bless ebay. i do pray for a smooth and honest transaction.
also, i went for the tourney at pc bunk! felt so out of place going alone. felt even more left out cos i had no one to talk to, despite at least, managing to find djasakurayoh, selbiex, rekusu and endlessocean. then i left for work.
totally missed the lucky draw(cos i didn't know it was happening even though i was there), and cake cutting(cos i had to go back to work). and that was half a day over. the only thing that really left an impression on me, is that lordsasa is a really nice person. he was the only one who asked how i was.. so i was greatly touched. he gives me the impression that he's reliable and trustworthy. bless him.
time to get back to work... ugh..